March 6th, 2019

The path of deepening authenticity is an interesting journey. To know thy self they say. Gurus and masters supposedly reached levels higher than our own that we look to, in order to relieve our suffering, whose responsibility is the  suffering of humanity? Level of attainment to enlightenment can teach nothing but to turn the compass of inquiry inside. The eternal inquiry of the self reminds us everything within is outside of us as well and every moment is a reflection.


I can not understand how my self has chosen to allow the suffering of an entire species yet in looking in the world if my self is here then I must have chosen this experience along with everyone else. What I know now after living this life for a short yet seemingly incredibly long 27 years is that in comparison to what I came here with this life is a blip in an infinitely spiralling timeline of evolutions. What I have found in my inquiries of my "Self" here on this earth is that I am not my "Self" I am not what or who i truly know I am. I Am a diluted distorted facsimile of my truth doing my best to survive in a reality which makes little to no sense to me.  As a person who feels more than the self in this body and more than the self in this plane with memories of universal travel and instant manifestation, I know in my heart and soul that nearly everything on this planet is currently presenting itself in an expression so far from real truth that my daily choice to live here is a struggle to lie to hold the projection of who I Am expecting myself to be. The parameters of this current dimension limit my capabilities which are so deeply encoded in my immortal being that even death to me is remembered as a transition simple and as continuous as walking out your door and going for a walk.


I contemplate daily my choices as a soul to be born into a reality of paradox sold a vision of truth by the voice of creation now only to be trapped on our confusion. The many minds which run through mine are constantly chattering of their pain. I may know you and I may not and I do know that your thoughts run deeper and much farther than you think and I know that the thoughts of a child in pain resound through the earth like a thunderstorm washing rain in such a downpour that it soaks us to the bones with the exact emotion the suffering one feels. Each of us is a child of the universe and there are nearly 8billion children of gaia in human form on this earth. There are an immeasurable of sentient beings on this earth. If you can see it it is sentient as if you see it is consciousness. The programmed reality we see is so sophisticated that we are missing yet another immeasurable number of sentient beings which live all around us at all times. This is on purpose. This is limiting us from our true power. To make the unbelievable possible again is where our freedoms lie. To believe in the beings and powers of universal flow we have forgotten and to throw away the paradigms of programmed realities convincing us to continue to feed the systems of slavery and illusions even on our work which seeks to break them.


Often I feel myself is in a rock and a hard place,  a trap so to speak. I know there is a doorway to the other side of life and I am here to open it. The beings I have recollected since I was a child a indescribable and they are real I may falter in my trust and I may falter in my faith because nothing I know to be true functions in this current dimension. Density is time evolution slowed down. We are being tricked and all of us are still blind. Until we can see the faeries, dragons, angels and wizards within us, until we can feel every feeling across the earth inside of our minds and hearts as if it is our own thought and we know our hands are joined through every realm, until we feel every drop of water and hear the community of people within them creating life in the earth, until we recognize mother earth as a person, until we recognize each other as the same person, until we promise to harm none especially ourselves, until we throw away the conditioning of mindless consumption feeding the system of funnels of wealth, until we think of community before ourselves, until we lift others up as equal, until we end corruption, until we see animals as people and trees as communities, when we see the realities we know in our hearts, our experiences of medicine our meditations our yoga, when we wake up and know that we can fly, know, believe and follow through I believe we are still blind. I am not speaking some metaphorical new age bullshit woo woo blabber. This is truth, this is ancient. This is older than the earth itself. This is Gaia, Unci Maka, Pachamama, Ima Adama, Mother Earth. You are her and every day we choose to cut into her body without asking, even as I type on this device made from mining and petroleum I am agreeing to continue harming the mother and myself. My only hope is that even though many days all I pray for is an escape back "home" to the lands of infinite creation and ever changing realities of true will power galaxies and spirits at our fingertips holding us in waves of love as we travel the multiverse rewriting the wrongs we've perpetuated in our different forms. I have been the destroyer I have been the abuser I have been the addict i have been the success i have been the teacher i have been the musician I have been hungry never starving I have been thirsty never deprived I have been grateful never satisfied I have hated living as a human and wanted to die yet not given up I have been a liar I have been the truth I have had integrity I have not I have been in anguish I have realised it is not so bad or it could be worse. Every day I feel guilty for being a "have" while my own ancestors bloodlines are the "have nots" every day I convince myself to keep going because there "must be a way to heal myself and really want to live, there must be a way to heal the earth and bring humanity back to truth, there must be  a way to enter the real world". Every day I have to convince myself that I am doing something worthwhile in this human prison and truthfully it has given me a countless number of gifts. I am learning that it is in the devotion to constantly removing the layers of deep seated/seeded ancestral pain, conditioning, trauma and through the admission of my own suffering and need for help my self expands. I am learning that as i begin to understand feelings which are not my own and really integrate the why i am connected to the visions of pain in my head my self expands and learns. The universe or whatever you call it is willing to give is gifts when overcome our challenges. Seems fucked up I know. This is how I believe it works: the perceptions if self limitations limit our reality and paint the daily picture of the most likely programmed pathway set by control forces, our thoughts and belief in our selves can only go so far until we break through the thought barriers which create our limitations some of these originate within us but many are energetic wave forms and overlays from all the electromagnetic distortions holding the illusion in place, the desire for control has set upon us an infinite number of mind traps which are actually in origin "external" to know the aura is very important in this case since thoughts can be picked up in the aura and some thoughts are being slingshot at us at light speed to oppress us all. When we break our own mental barriers we deflect and reverse these thought waves and turn them into truth and affirmations of healing. Everytime you heal yourself and clear your mind you creat a rainbow rain of thought waves which spread across the earth everytime we experience our pain express it and release it we transmute the storms of suffering and in turn eventually re-create reality itself. I am reminding myself to be patient. Sometimes I feel myself losing grip on wanting to be. When I know it is so easy to exist in a million other places at once, yet something calls me to stay. Often the convergence of universal information  flying into my brain keeps me up or wakes me up at 200 in the morning, maybe you have some information for us too. I have no idea if anything I say matters but the words just come out and i know they will reach someone.


If i had an answer i would give it to you freely. For now i have tools to get us closer. As much as I can I am here for you as much as I am am healing for you I know you are doing the same for me. Even though i may not always be there when you want me to be i am always thinking of you because I can't shut my mind off anyways. If I have met you you are on my mind. If I have worked with I feel your feeling and I hear you thinking in whispers and chatter dreams and journeys and in these whispers I know you are growing. If I have known you I am praying for you. If I do not know you I am praying for you you are my relative. May we all remember who we truly are.

February 14th, 2019

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One day we will all remember who we are and the gateways of divinity will open to show us the great ceremony of life once again. We will drum and we will dance and the earth will shake and change. We will fly and we will sing and everything will expand into a great revealing of truths from all levels of consciousness. I invite the divine consciousness of the all that is to remind us all of divine love which flow between and within everything. One day we will all remember the truth within us all and I believe in you that you already do. Thank you for being patient with the return of the truth. Thank you for being patient to be here on this earth as we pray for the reawakening of the divine goddess spirit of mother Gaia her awakening is the return of sacred spaces in all the places of this earth. The divine ceremony of life will dance us through the destruction and mother Gaia will weave waves of light and breathe the wind through our souls to purify and cleanse the consciousness mutilated by fear. This great cleansing will force out all sickness lovingly and prepare us to lie down in the living embrace of a patch of nature regrowing over the cold concrete skeleton of a dying society. The mother is calling you to awaken and the waves of conscious co creation lifeforce of the kundalini golden palace of divine union flows through every circle of consciousness in the infinite spiral of all time. Words upon words could not explain the pictures in my mind but to listen inside and these very same picture you will find.

- Tahawa Eli iTruth

January 17, 2019

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In a flash and a crack everything can change and all of reality can become a wave 

In truth I have been burning in the fires of my perceived self as my prayers are answered to burn away what was who I Am. Who I am now is the same as I am always and even though parts of me have been broken and wounded I am all of them and I am one with them too. 

I am not broken but I have disrespected my soul and this has made fragments of my being. These pieces left behind are like starving children crying for the mother they lost. We are all here right now in this fragmented state as one with all reality without even realizing what separation really means. 

If we are separate from one another we are are isolated from our connection to our true selves. As I burn away the perceptions I built from my own illusions and reintegrate all the starving parts of my being left behind I recollect that I am everything I have ever been and everything I ever will be uniting into one convergence of universal energy in each moment I breathe. So I breathe more deeply in reflection of this notion as I weave an ocean of consciousness with my words. 

If you have reached out to me know that I hear you and I am with you. In any way I know we are together in this change and the burning proceeds. I feel my beingness moving through tunnels of fear and darkness as I attempt to run away from the heaven I am creating with 
"The work" while the well of information overwhelms my systems daily I scrape my claws into pits of despair to find some kind of comfort in hiding from the world I have convinced myself i do not belong within. What is this world anyways that we perceive in front of our eyes waging war on the eternal spirit and seeking the destruction of all that is powerful and sacred in this realm of mother Gaia. How can we hide from her tears any longer when it rains upon our heads with daily blessings of life and we take her grief and turn it into money? The rain can bring joy too when we dance and sing for her glory in gratitude for giving to us the very substance which gives us breath. Yet we continue to steal her essence from deep within and ask ourselves why we feel stolen from in society.

I hear myself consumed in thoughts of escaping this reality and observe and express the truths that I can not see how life can continue as it is and I can not see how I can commit to living a life in this world as it is. Sometimes i ask to leave my body and yet my mission remains. Many deadlines missed by us all leave me stranded for finding hope and inspiration again. Personal deadlines yes but the greater lifelines handed to us from the infinite cosmos pouring galaxies upon the Earth calling us to awaken have been polluted with fear blanketed and commodified. When medicine became a commodity so do our souls. 

I have been scrambling to make sense of the babbles in my brain as babbling brookes of consciousness whisper thought forms beyond my current understanding and often without my desired result flow through and I process clear and burn the thoughts which no longer serve in observation of the continuous flow of a mind listening to channels of the universe divine and all. What isn't?

If I claim anything I know it is that I am still her because I am waiting for you speak up! If there is any truth I know it is that your lost words flow through my being and they are screaming for you to say them. Just as much as mine are hidden deep inside I know that yours are too. How much inspiration do we let die because of fear? Every breath must be breathed in and breathed out and inspiration works like this. If we hold breath in too long the breath dissolves and dies away. Waiting for exhale and release to be replenished. Imagine all inspiration and creation, creative ideas flowing are just like breath only the inspiration is the inhale and the exhale is the creation in fullness and follow through in flow, appearing as envisioned with even more blessings than imagined. However if the exhale does not move forward into creation the inspiration dies and becomes waste waiting to be released. 

I have done this too many times, not finished a project, unfinished messages, so many floating ideas unmanifested holding weight over my being and telling me I am a failure and I am not worth it all the while they were my own expectations in the first place. I think too highly of myself perhaps. Ego is a funny friend sometimes but a great mirror and lesson teacher. It is important to feel the truth within the reflection of feelings expressed through allowance. I have learned the deeper I feel and the more honest I am with my authentic self and with all of reality around me the more the fires of transformation burn the old away and the waters of truth wash it all into regeneration. 

The great spirit has been guiding me on this path since I can remember and the truth is I have been exhausted since I can remember. The sickness of society ripe with daily murder, fear, oppression of millions of beings on this earth. Inequality rampant, ancestral pain flying left right and centre. Wayward spirits vying for attention calling my dreams or catching my "eye"from a window or over a shoulder. 

There is a story to this magical journey and the story will be told in pieces. I have no real understanding of what my journey holds next but I know it involves this group of people. Perhaps these words will be shared with more but the connections to the magic and miracles bouncing around the world through all of you are tangible and are blessed. All levels of suffering which flow through me are welcome and are burning, and washing. I am learning to feel the pain of the earth and her children while allowing myself to grieve my own illusions. I am learning to rewrite my mind and recollect my energies from around the universe into being to expand the consciousness that I am. I am allowing truth to flow through all that I am in the expansion of the waves of consciousness uplifting us all. 

I am ready for the next steps of my journey and I know this means many out there in the world are ready. I know I have been waiting for this for a long time and we are about to rise together as one for the infinite expansion of us all. It may take some changes upon the planet. The animals will be seen and hear. The earth will flow again. The trees will speak. The fires will burn and the water will flow as seeds of light are planted again. The air will breathe and prana expands and the mind blows open to oneness again. What if everything you have ever thought possible suddenly became possible? What if everything we think to be real and possible here in this current reality was limited from what is truly possible? What if belief and collective will are the keys to unlock infinite possibilities? I believe I can fly! Do you? I believe you can fly! Do you? 

As the fires burns the old away I allow myself to breathe in the light of a new day a new era of Self. I am ready to show mySelf to mySelf which means I am ready to share more with all of you. There is magick in the world. Magick is definitely real. Magic is in front of your right now. Music is magick. Musical magical pretty close words right. You have amazing things happening around you all day long and that is true magic. There is power in this group and there is magick in this post. Your eyes will transform the world into love and light by seeing the truth of the hidden shadows in the crevices of the wounds and cracks upon the world. Everytime our mother hurts we hurt everytime we hurt our mother hurts. Everytime we cause pain and suffering upon each other one another animals trees rocks alike people friends family lovers brothers sisters countries fathers mothers races species plants and waters we all feel the pain. For this pain and my part in its perpetuation I apologize for my ignorance and I apologize for my irreverence of your suffering. It is the Selfish I which gets lost in suffering. It is the i and i which leads to conclusion and resolution. When we truly see each other is when we truly see our mother. How can you look upon a suffering child or a suffering animal or a suffering ethnic group and turn away without even as little as a mention? How could I? For the times I have turned away and perpetuated injustice I apologize I will remember to always speak my mind. Who are we really is still the question which leads me through the deepest rabbit holes to the lightest of places!

Magic really does exist and many gifts are within us all sometimes my "gifts" feel like "curses" sometimes I feel too much and can not sleep for weeks as the onslaught of information of the universe and suffering worlds flies through my mind at a million miles per minute with pictures and movies alike to show me the truth of what I am praying for to remind me "the work" is needed. Right into tunnels of light and sacred geometry flying and playing with angel abounding from corners of the universe unknown to the naked or closed eyes and open only to those ready to let love in. To jumping through gateways portals and brains thoughtwaves patterns dreams and scenes of memories and universes and world beyond this one pulling me so close to back home. Where is home really? They say it is where the heart is and when I go into my heart and out the other side I see planets of lightwaves like spinning atoms of electricity activating sound waves vibrations gravity and velocity as souls woven from lightbeams sparkles and sounds from the cloth of the source quilt in a little light ball so round so perfect so shiny so bright so magical divine and infinite light yet surrounded by loneliness and a question beyond. Who am I really who is this "GOD" ? Lol

- Tahawa Eli iTruth

December 18th, 2018

Magic really is everywhere when we simply open our eyes to the brightened starchild within us all underneath sallow faces and solemn stares of empty eyes lies a light hidden in the dark universe of illusionary worlds

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A simple gaze can hold connection long enough to light the spark and find infinite ways to reach the inner child starving for reality

We lose ourselves beneath the imagery and tomfoolery of presentation through imbibing of fakery the deeper self may crack open as we seek to break our spirits something unbreakable never gives up 

In a whisper deep inside everything shines within the cocoon of a reality not so real to peel of the layers of the vision of illusion is really the task the authentic self is the leader to truth in discomfort we can find layers of truth but in silence we only block them 

I choose to see the magic of the brightened star child within us all beneath the solemn gaze of wandering spirits seeking to break the unbreakable truth. We are all one.

November 10, 2018

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Joy embraces my being my soul my light into expansion and love as I dig through the soil of my shadows and plant the seeds of light deep within my depths

I am the earth and I am the universe of my own creation as my soul occupies this vessel I open to the truth of understanding my wounds as I reflect the truth of my being through ego 

Ego teaches me that I am still attached to the realms of pain stuck within the universe of my light I am light and I will overcome to rise above and climb above the space of pain to the space of truth from the language of the heart

When we speak truly from the peace and the language of the heart we can truly be heard and we can truly listen in the expression of the deep pain of the wound from the emotion which created it we spread fear finding the depth of truth and feeling it from a place of love opens alchemical transformation

Lead is poison to the body and emotions can be like the lead stuck inside of us through intention and deep focus of alchemical energies from the cosmic universe we can harness the light waves and pressure codes necessary to transmute the poisons of density within us into alchemical gold the light within us is made of gold if we allow the divine teachers within and all around us to bring us the forces of the golden chain of teachings from source everyone is a guru

Entering this current trapped state of mother Gaia cause cognitive dischord in the brain as a soul coming from places beyond the poisons of realities consuming control. The consumption of control is the alchemy which turns the gold inside of us to poison and turns the oxygen around us to carbon and the water withing us and us is our mother earth, into pain. 

When we take from the oceans and spill the blood of our brothers and sisters into the rivers into the sea with no regard for the truth of the golden light inside of every being animals of all kinds we poison the purity into pain. I love myself. I love my ocean. I love my universe. I love my mind. Water changes as thoughts flow vibrations of light. Crystalline transformation embodies each day and night and the great release of fear begins with the admission of misplacement. How right can one feel in a reality of lies? I love myself. I accept myself. I am love. I am comfortable. I am safe. 

As we are the writers of our own realities and the designers of the greater universe the grid is made of love. I come from love. I come from truth. Our bodies are one we are one with the earth. Can you feel her pain? 

Even in my own suffering I am always learning as the observatory of my brain contains personalities of all time as spirit beings communicate in electrical wavelengths I find understandings in my learnings as I shine my own light through my shadows. Have you seen your truth yet? Are you sure? I am confident. I am powerful. I am truth. I am the power of my solar plexus shining sunlight over darkness of demons of consciousness thought forms stuck from a grieving race? Why do we perpetuate pain? I am happy. I am grace. I am free. I am truly me. I will be all that I always need to be
I will see the truths I need to see. 

How are you today? How are we today? How is mother earth today? How is she today? How is he today? What are we feeling today? Every being holds an electrical signature which transmits its vibration into the earth through dna left from life in the physical plane. When we bleed the earth cries. The electrical signal of every disregarded life or being left behind, eyes turned blind to suffering, blasts out into the electrical network of the mycelium and all plants. The plants breathe out the signals of instinct. Have you ever felt anxious? Why would the trees feel anxious? Why would animals feel anxious? Why would the air breathe anxiety? Every life left behind puts out a call for help and every being on the earth feels this distress call every day without even realizing it. 

When will the bough break? When will the cradle fall? Who will be there to catch the baby? Who cares enough to catch us as we fall? I love myself. I love the earth. I love my brothers. I love my sisters. I love the animals. I love my family. I love us all. I am love. I am light. I am powerful. I shine bright. 

As I channel my divine mind for the search of truth to be here to find reality I open to the being of my mind. I am open to change and I embrace it all the tough times the struggles the flight and the fall. As I spin my webs of words to send out sacred vibrations I pray that the healing spreads through all nations as light entrances my soul with divinity I pray for us all to remember our infinity. I feel the earth beat heartbeat beneath my feet as the bird sings the sounds of the sea the trees breathe my breath into me all is connected. As I pray with my medicine sacred plants in my hand transmitting the transmutations of the ethers i stand with blessing of the return of the light I put out through my being as I pray for the might to go on each day. I am you and you are me. As I breathe what the trees breathe we breathe what you breathe and we can hear everything. Breath contains your fears, emotions, thoughts, crystallized into water into energy into prana from divine light flowing in quantum time with the miracle of nature. I breathe and I hear your pain and the pain of a lost child. I see the sun shine in my 3rd eye and remember the desserts of Africa. I see the ocean in my home and watch the machines as they roam and remember a time beyond my life where all things were clear and the majesty of nature was observation. 

Do you trust your mind? I trust myself I love myself I am love.

- Tahawa Eli iTruth

October 21, 2018

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So many waves so much magic. I have been moving through some very deep shadows digging in an cleansing out thoughts which no longer serve us. These thoughts, in some, become emotions and these emotions can "crystallize" within. Prayer, sound, water and chosen sacred medicines can assist to break up these crystallized emotions and transmute them back into Crystal of Light. Within us each we hold the keys to our own evolution and these keys can be hidden underneath the stagnant emotions which pile up through the daily onslaught of waves of thought and programmed consciousness. 

The waves of consciousness of "the good" "the truth" "the love" have increased greatly and these waves are reprogramming the minds of humanity away from the brainwashing of a sick society. On this planet, at this time, in this reality which we are melting and changing each day with our thoughts and feelings as we move into truth, the waves of the light are still counter balanced by the waves of the dark. 

Some of us have been experiencing deep seated and deep seeded fears within us coming to the surface. This may surface as frustration, pain, mental anguish, insomnia, the roots are fear and confusion. The desire to strive to be something in an equation which does not equate creates cognitive dissonance and leads to the perpetuation of separation through extreme experience. 

We are in a time of great change unseen on this planet before. The population has never been so large as a humanoid race while simultaneously so out of balance with nature. At this time we are being offered the opportunity to seize truth in our hands and add it to the program of this reality. We need to become the encoders of our our own encoded destinies and allow our internal truth to flow out into the reality we see. Everything is a reflection and many minds feel trapped, when you take a glance around the world one thing you can be certain exists everywhere are traps, traps and prisons for animals, prison for people, credit cards, traps to cling to this existence of entrapment are everywhere. How many times a day do you put someone in a box in your mind? 

Each definition within this world is programmed through mass advertising and "education", this system is clearly broken, as it seems that what is "right" and is so rightly accepted seems wrong to most of us and what is so clearly so wrong is consistently justified as "right" this is the nature of injustice. 

When minds are programmed through brainwashing everyone becomes responsible to hold the systems in place. Everything you sign and every dotted lign is another agreement to perpetuate the systems which so many of us can see naturally and intrinsically, are actually backwards. The heart feels truth, the mind, heart and core fashion all decisions as one united system of discernment, when beings are forced to drive off one system of the being at a time the others go offline or become confused, chaotic or stuck. Poisons in food or water perpetuate the crystallization of stuck energy this stuck energy perpetuates control and destroys free will by amplifying need and need to survive. 

The ones who are partially controlling this reality for their gains are fully aware that this process is happening within us. Our process of prayer, sound and medicine will break us free of the chains, the chains start in your mind. 

I am good enough! I am enough! I am beautiful! I am deserving! I am worthy of love and communion! I am worthy! I am valuable beyond perceived value! I Am the truth! I am love!I am loved!I am clear I am healthy I am well I am peace I am bliss I am abundant I am abundance

I activate here and now the true divine blueprint of my whole and destined being!

I activate here and now my full and True Self inviting all knowledge of truth and love from all of my personal timelines and existences. 

I am the light.

I am the love.

I am powerful. 

Every thought and feeling which moves through my mind flows as water to the sea relieving me of suffering. 

As I hear the pain of mySelves in my mind I choose to love me.

As I hear the suffering of the earth in my heart I choose to love her. 

As I hear the suffering of the earth in my core and all of her children cry in my soul i choose to love them all. 

We are them, they are we. 

As I hear the truth of existence in waves of light and waves of darkness I accept my power to swim surf and fly. 

I am the truth.

I am magical

I am powerful.

Infinite waves of consciousness wash over me as lines and vines connected to souls and beings all around the earth and I feel them I see them I pray for them I follow the lightlines I see and I hold them with love and light and wings of peace calling a circle of angels to stand around each suffering being I feel and see I feel and think and remember what they do even if only for a moment. I am the same as you. We are one. Not everything you feel belongs to you. But everything we feel belongs to we. 

I love you.

- Tahawa Eli iTruth

October 19th, 2018

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My life has been blessed by the process of being a channel of the light and the ancient memories of the divine. I refer to this identity as a process seeing as most of the time I Am here in navigation of the curses which come along with this blessing.

Entering the earth with memories from beyond it have made life less than easy to cope with as long as I can remember I remember thinking oops I think I signed up for the wrong reality. Can someone please come down here to revisit this contract......... and so appeared a Spirit Dog, Junior Coal. He was a companion from another life and he told me my mission this time was to live in compassion as I filter the darkness out of the shine of humanity. The shine is like the aura. Each of us has one and so does collective consciousness and our shine, shines around the atmosphere of Gaia. 

Encoded with external eternal internal memory and an optimism for the awakening of humanity, Junior Coal reminded me of roots to the core of the earth and white light washing me constantly. I started my work and began filtering the pain and the thoughts and the suffering from anywhere I could sense it or see the red spots of dark spots or tendrils and vines of oppression. I began pouring white light and gold light and smiling over it all. 

With memories of powers beyond this current earth paradigm I began to get frustrated in the truth of my current limitations. I knew there was more. I knew that my powers were lost somewhere just across the veil and I would began to search for them. Forgetting leads to anger leads to numbness leads to remembering leads to anger; leads to peace? 

We shall see.

- Tahawa Eli iTruth